How We Are Formed, Pt. 2
community group guide
Vision Series Session 7: How We Are Formed, Pt. 1
INTRO: (2-3 minutes)
Welcome to Community Group! Start off by introducing everyone in the group and then praying and asking the Holy Spirit to move and guide the conversation for the evening.
As we continue in our Vision Series, our goal today is to continue discussing how Gospel change happens in us. Let us focus now on our friendships and talk about how they work to bring about change in our lives.
DISCUSSION: (10-15 minutes)
SAY the following: Over the past couple of decades our cultural perception of friendship has changed drastically. We have moved into a sort of post-friendship stage where quantity outweighs quality. Our self-worth is often defined now by how many “followers” we have or “likes” we get on social media.
ASK the group:
Have you ever had or do you currently have a friendship that is truly “authentic”?
A. Why would you describe it as authentic?
B. How does it help to grow you?
After discussing, have someone read John 15:12-15
“This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. No one has greater love than this, to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. You are my friends if you do what I command you. I do not call you servants any longer, because that servant does not know what the master is doing; but I have called you friends, because I have made known to you everything that I have heard from my Father.”
SAY the following: It is no surprise to us that the desire for authentic friendship sits deep in the heart of every person. When a child is able to start speaking they often call everyone in their daycare or school their “best friend”. This desire starts from the moment we realize the joy and benefit that comes from true friendship.
However, much like children, many of us are quick to walk away from friendships when they begin to show some cracks or when it does not suit us the way we think it should. Being quick to end those relationships can be a sign that it was never really an authentic friendship in the first place. Authentic friendships last, no matter the storm, and as a result we are all the better for it.
Like Jason said, there are many characteristics of an authentic friendship but three major characteristics are VULNERABILITY, ACCOUNTABILITY and RESTORATION/RECONCILIATION. These three characteristics are not easy to display. But just like everything else, the more we practice them, the easier they become.
A lot of us are really good at being one-sided in these areas--meaning we are good with allowing others to be vulnerable; we are good at holding others accountable and we are good at reconciling when it’s presented to us. But, how often do we reciprocate these things? As we bear others’ burdens we MUST be willing to allow them to bear ours and to lovingly correct us. To experience the greatest fruit and authentic friendships we have to be willing to seek reconciliation when hurts occur.
APPLICATION: (approx. 10-15 minutes)
Take a couple minutes to discuss which of these three characteristics you are strong in and which ones need work in your life. While you share or while you listen, make a plan to focus on one over this next week. Come up with one goal regarding one of the three characteristics and write it down in your phone. Maybe you need to be vulnerable with a close friend. Maybe you need to ask someone to help hold you accountable. You might even need to reach out to someone this week to restore a strained relationship. Whatever it is, write it down before you leave.
CLOSING: (5-10 minutes)
No matter which area is a weakness for you, try to ask someone to help make sure you are pursuing your goal over the next week. Goals are much easier to reach when we have people cheering us on!
Take prayer requests and close in prayer.